The Red Accordion Diaries

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What are you reading?! Ever since my surgery, I've been completely unable to focus on anything. I already have #neurodiversesquad issues, but I've learned how to manipulate my mind when I need to. Since that anesthesia, however, my brain fog is just IMMENSE. I have been trying to get through a light, Scottish rom-com, beach read, and I just cannot. I'd love nothing more to be lost in a novel right now, though, so I'm going to list some good reads and hope that inspires me to focus a little more. I'd love to hear what you're reading and will happily take recommendations.

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Now... Let's talk Lockdown Reading! What have you read?

I am currently reading:

The Bookshop on the Shore by Jenny Colgan.

I love Jenny Colgan novels. I think they are rom-com? I am terrible with genres. There is almost always a Scotland, and if not, there is an England. There are always smart book references. This book is the 2nd of a trilogy, and I accidentally read books 1 and 3 without paying attention. Oops. (Who out there is cringing right now at the thought of reading a trilogy out of order?!?! Answer: My Husband.)

I have recently read:

Year of Wonders: A Novel of the Plague by Geraldine Brooks, which is loosely based on a real town in England that chose to self-quarantine during the Plague of 1666. It wasn't light reading, but it was easy reading. Again, I'm a sucker for British novels. Also, I borrowed this from a neighbor in March and have yet to return it, making me that person. Oops.

The Second-Worst Restaurant in France by Alexander McCall-Smith I just love this author. He has written so many series, and there's always just a light element of philosophy that makes me think I'm not wasting my time. The books are easy reads, though, so I learn stuff, think deeper than most beach-reads, and enjoy losing myself in them. This one takes place in Edinburgh, Scotland, and a small town in France.

Maybe You Should Talk to Someone by Lori Gottlieb I'm a sucker for a memoir. This one serves as some fun therapy too.

I'm thinking about reading:

The Nightingale by Kristin Hannah

This was the last book my mom ever read. Do you ever think about that? What the last book you'll read is? Mom liked this one. She'd borrowed it from a friend, and I even remembered to return the book before her funeral, which I'm pretty sure is my greatest accomplishment from the last several years. Anyway, I've not read the book, but my mom told me I'd like it. I'm grief-afraid though.

Ok. Five books feels like plenty. Didn't I tell you my focus was off?

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Books. I spent last Monday clearing out about 30% of my parents’ attic. About 90% of what I got rid of was (or is it were?): books. SO many books.

The beautiful thing about these books is that they were all read. My parents' favorite pastime was reading. They read at dive bars, swimming pools, airplanes, road trips, during my gymnastics classes, piano lessons, play practice. They read everywhere. They couldn’t change a light bulb or hang a frame, but they’d read Ulysses — and discussed it on their first date.

Hoarding books was something I learned from infancy. Re-homing books is something I’ve embraced as an adult.

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The musty smell of my attic (identical to the Strand Book Store in NYC) brought loads of feelings, but my! was it freeing to load up my friend’s car and pay her to take the books away.

When I go into a depression (and I have been deeply depressed lately — a tear-filled, joyless blob who posts selfies so people will tell me I’m pretty and maybe that will release some dopamine ::shrug emoji::), I lose myself in books. It’s February and I’ve read ten books so far this year.

They have not been particularly cerebral books. I’m drawn to books that don’t make me think, but do make me feel things that are different than oh-my-god-my-dad-has-cancer-TOO-what-the-actual-hell.

What am I reading right now?

Maisie Dobbs #1*

This feels like a cheat because it’s a re-read. I chose it for Neighbor Book Club this month. I’ve never had to choose the book, so it was very stressful for me. I wanted a book that others probably hadn't read, but that I thought had staying power. I’ve read something like thirteen of the Maisie Dobbs books, but not in a long time. I’ve actually forgotten the plot of the first one, so I’m enjoying re-reading it. It’s written by a woman and has a brilliant woman as a main character (honestly, I've kinda of sworn off books written by men unless I have good reason to read them. We were assigned books by men 99% of our academic lives, so I feel like I have a lot of catching up to do in the world of women and minorities). It’s set in the 1920s-1930s London, and is a light mystery that’s well-written and charming.

Quick review of some others I’ve read this year:

The Year of Less: I listened to this on audiobook while i was cleaning out crap. It was fine, but it made me a little annoyed. A woman tries not to buy things for a year. I don’t think I can read Nouveau-Thoreavian books written by twenty-somethings who haven’t suffered real hardships. It just makes me angry in general at the world that the stories being published and told are those of middle-class white people, which then makes me wonder what the hell business I have writing a book when i should be out looking to help other people tell their stories. But I digress...

Dirty Like Me: This was a super dirty book. I’m trying to read more of these because I feel like I’d be very good at writing romance novels, but I am still having trouble figuring out when it's a sweet story versus when it's just pure erotica -- or some combination. I need to come up with a pen name though, so y’all don’t disown me.

The Ten Thousand Doors of January: I really enjoyed this book. It was a book-club pick, and I was so proud of myself for reading it. Of course i didn’t attend the book club, so oops. I have a really good habit of “joining” book clubs and then never going.

The Princess Diarist: Oh my god, this book made me so embarrassed for Carrie Fisher because she totally printed actual diaries she kept from when she was 19 and aaaaaack, even though she was a perfectly good writer — better than most! — it was still super embarrassing. I’ve got some of my old journals, but I shall reserve any old-publishing for my Patreon community. (Hint hint PRETTY PLEASE sign up over there? Because you know I won’t ever be releasing another album again because no one does that anymore because the music business has changed and it’s just a total money-pit to put out an actual album so PLEASE subscribe to musicians’ patreons instead?)

Murder in an Irish Village: I like Ireland. I love little mysteries like this. It was no Agatha Raisin because the main character isn’t quite as memorable, but it got me out of my own head and into a small Irish Village for a few days. That was nice.

Christmas Shopaholic: Is this the moment when you realize that Brigid Kaelin likes Sophie Kinsella? Can we still be friends? Mindless. Pleasant. Not my favorite of the series, but I read the whole thing terribly quickly.

Cosy: The British Art of Comfort A perfectly charming read that also makes me wonder why the hell I haven’t written a full-on book yet because I am pretty sure this book is just a really long blog entry. It would be a nice book for the back of the toilet, if you are one of those people who doesn’t scroll through Twitter while you’re pooping.

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*(these are amazon affiliate links - i'm not quite sure what it does, but i think i'm supposed to tell you upfront!)

1. Any book with the word "Paris" in the title. Seriously, it should be its own genre. I'd like to write in that genre. One year I'm going to "summer in France" (I have always wanted to use the word "summer" as a verb), and I'm going to write one of these light-hearted rom-com novels. I once read that if the book you want to read doesn't exist, you should write it. I'm pretty sure I've exhausted this particular genre, so maybe time to write some more.

2. Dryer balls. It took me a zillion years to jump on this wagon, even though I stopped using fabric softener ages ago. As a compromise to the rest of my household, who prefer the fabric softener sheets, I ordered these little balls. They just live in the dryer, and they somehow make it seem like I've used one of those little sheets of carcinogens, except it's non-toxic.

3. Better Without Booze. It's an instagram page, with a website to follow, created by my friend and favorite blogger, Joy Manning. I have not quit drinking, but ever since my first pregnancy, I've asked bartenders to "make me something fun, but non-alcoholic." They've always enjoyed the task, and it's nice to see a whole feed devoted to beautiful mocktails. I still love a good whisky or G&T or glass of prosecco (bubbly has been my thing in recent years), but I rarely drink these days. I don't get enough sleep as it is with these babies, and we all know how alcohol keeps you up at night.

4. Planner Pad. I like this day-planner as a good way to make sense of the variety of projects I've got on my To Do list. It categorizes your tasks and funnels it through a priority list, beginning with everything for the week, to everything for the day, to specific times, which is extremely helpful for a visual-oriented self-employed person who gets overwhelmed easily and who also has, like, zero time.

5. DryBar. I've only been once, but I foresee this being the new TreatYoSelf of choice. I don't like to straighten my hair because I want to encourage the natural curls (you know how angry I get when Anne Hathaway gets a blowout in The Princess Diaries to signify that she is now a refined princess because natural curls do NOT EQUATE TO INSANITY), but I still like playing dress-up from time to time. And, though I may not like the back story, I do feel like a movie star after a blowout, apparently. Or a princess. Can you imagine that Kate Middleton probably has an in-house blowout person?? (Or is it in-palace?)

Also : I'm mostly funded on my pre-order campaign -- 99%. www.pledgemusic.com/brigidkaelin if you want to order my new album on CD or just as a download or buy something else from my cooooooool store.
Louisville, I'm playing an acoustic show July 7 at Goodwood Brewery with Steve Cooley. And I'm also playing July 28 at Headliners with a full band and lots of special guests! I have some tickets in hand and you can paypal or venmo or whatever $$ to me to buy them without the extra ticket fee that buying them online will charge you. They are $10 each.

I'm not in the photo much -- but here I am!

I'm going a little stir-crazy not having a record to tour and promote -- it's still one bass part away from finished, but time is conspiring against me. In the mean time, I've been doing ALL I can to promote my own self-care. Life is tough now, and there are a few things that have kept me sane:

1. Yoga. I'm not sure if it's the endorphins of exercise, the mindfulness of breathing, or the simple fact that with yoga I get an hour without anyone grabbing my nipples, but I leave feeling better. When I find I've gone a few days without going to the studio (simply doing a podcast at home does not have the same effect, as you might conclude from watching the time-lapse video of my toddler grabbing me while I'm bending), I am irritable and not a great parent -- not a great person, honestly. I'm moody, negative, and can throw a tantrum over a crushed Cheerio on the floor or a 4-year-old who decides it's Naked Time.

2. The Fresh 20. I've been using this meal planning site for going on two years now. Whenever I stray from planning, the family suffers. We spend more than we should at the grocery, or we order takeout because there's nothing to eat. We also eat less nutritious meals, or we end up just grazing all week. Or it's breakfast for every meal. I tried out multiple meal planning websites, and TheFresh20.com is the only one I remotely enjoyed. It's probably an 80-90% success rate on the "Would I order this at a restaurant?" scale by which we judge recipes. I've only had one meal the whole time that I straight up did not like. We subscribe to the Vegetarian annual plan. I don't put ANY thought into dinner now, and I know that I have the ingredients on hand to cook a well-balanced meal every night. It helps that my kids are not picky eaters. The shopping list also means I can send someone else to the store for me. I haven't used Kroger ClickList yet, but I've got a good friend who combines TheFresh20 with the Kroger ClickList and declared it a life-changer.

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Yummy quinoa vegetable bowl.

3. Journaling. Writing has always been the single-most important thing to my sanity. Since having a baby, I simply have not had a good routine and haven't been able to journal. I like doing morning pages -- something I got from The Artist's Way many years ago -- but my kids get up too early for me to do anything in the morning. I've taken to arriving at yoga 15 minutes early and bringing my journal. I sit there, ignore everyone, and just write -- mostly nonsense, occasionally lyrics. I am sure that I look like a jerk with my pen and my notebook in my corner, but it helps immensely. I am actually able to empty my mind a little during the poses because I got a lot of the To Do list out in my morning pages. Also, if I don't go to yoga, I don't write. Then I really am a jerk.

4. Antidepressants. I should have led with this because if we are being completely honest, it's the Prozac that got me enough willpower to sign up for yoga and then leave the house in the first place. I've never had a problem being honest, so I probably should have made this my #1. But I just thought about it, and I don't feel like re-ordering my list. Because it's a blog, and I'm not going to edit if I'm not getting paid.

Me, playing a German polka gig.

5. Work. I'm gigging a lot. Not as much as I would like. But my work is my passion, and I am renewed when I do it. Music is probably the only thing that allows me to zone out and be in the moment.

6. Pinterest. I can check all the other social media apps on my phone, but when I open Pinterest, I actually feel my heart rate slowing and myself relaxing. I think it's like opening a trashy magazine on an airplane. I just look at things -- pretty things, good ideas, lists made by other people. I have no false dreams of crafting tiny hats that look like vegetables, but it makes me happy to see photos of other people's good ideas. Talk about distraction.

7. Novels. Whether it's an audiobook or a late-night Kindle purchase, I am a novel fiend. When I'm not doing great mentally, I like to read really easy books. Now that I'm a mom, I somehow like mysteries -- total #mombooks. I also really enjoy British chick-lit, though I wish there was a better name for it. What else ... Maisie Dobbs and Agatha Raisin books have been perfect distractions over the past 4.5 years since the first wee boy was born.

8. A cuppa. Tea. Oh, how I love tea.

Now... Let's talk Lockdown Reading! What have you read?

I am currently reading:

I have recently read:

I'm thinking about reading:

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