The guilt of parenthood.

My kiddo goes to preschool now. It's the greatest thing in the world. I'm telling you this because you probably think you are supposed to sob and cry and fake misery at the thought of your little creature growing up so big and being gone from you for a few hours each day. Guess what? Not all parents feel that way ... remember, don't believe what you read on Facebook.

I'm starting to feel like myself again. I completely adore The Wee Boy, and I LOVE going to pick him up, and I love our snuggles (yes, he still sleeps in our bed), and I love playing trains, and I love going on walks, and I love when he helps me cook (boy can crack an egg one-handed and not get any shell in the bowl!), and him at almost-two is pretty much the cutest thing in the world, and I'll be sad when he has to shave one day and doesn't want to snuggle. I swear I'm appreciating the now, gathering my rosebuds, etc, etc.

But being gone from him a few hours a day is so so so so so so so so nice.

I'm still getting caught up from the past two years of getting absolutely nothing accomplished (read: two years of business receipts, bookkeeping, taxes, accounting, emails, phone calls, and all that fun stuff I needed to do for my businesses, but simply couldn't manage while being on kid-duty), but I see a light where soon ... very very soon ... I might be able to actually concentrate on, not just the business of my business, but the ART of my business.

As in, I might actually be able to book a few days in a recording studio and finish the album that is five years overdue.

I keep reminding myself of a conversation I had almost two months ago with my most-famous-friend, whose name I will not drop here, but anyone who knows me or reads my blog could probably figure out to whom I am referring. Anyway, he told me that his wife, who also happens to be a musician, sometimes also hires a babysitter so that she can play piano, and that I should not feel remotely guilty about doing just that. I think that's pretty good advice. And now I don't feel guilty.

So here's my advice: don't feel guilty. Especially, don't feel guilty for not feeling guilty, people. 

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